the only objection i have to all of the ap work is that i have less time to watch films. i'm like a hindu without his turban. or some shit.

*The Basic Stuff*

1. What's your name: giuseppe
2. When were you born: decades from the reason we have pearl harbor day
3. Where were you born: most likely on a bed, in front of my mom
4. Do you still live there: that would be pretty fucking gross
5. What is the color of you hair: black hole sun, won't you come?
6. The color of your eyes: brown bear carwash
7. How tall are you: 5'6", making me inelligible for an on-screen kiss with monica bellucci
8. What is your astrological sign: astrologically speaking i'm half man and half horse and i parade around town with a bow and arrow like i'm raw at archery
9. Where do you live: a place that is borderline ghetto superstar
10. Do you like living there: knock on wood 'cuz we all live in hollywood
11. Do you go to School: sorry summer
12. What grade are you in: senioritis
13. What is your mascot: those indians really got a raw deal
14. Are you in any clubs or sports: i'm not good at any of them, especially recycling
15. If so, what: project deflame, mr. pink speaking
16. Do you you have any brothers or sisters: i've told john he's been adopted so many times that i'm beginning to believe it
17. What is their name and ages: jonji is two years younger than me

*Favorites*

18. Movie: heh.
19. Actor: there will never be another toshiro mifune
20. Actress: does penelope cruz have to bear her chest in every film she does? i hope so!
21. Animal: the drunken humanm, a savagely honest beast of the wild!
22. Cereal: i used to be the authorative professor on this subject, but times change
23. Shoe: what up chuck?
24. Outfit: fresh, dressed like fifty cents (thrifty, not the rapper)
25. Subject: ninjas
26. Candy: heroin (it's a new line of fruit flavored gum by wrigley's, i swear!)
27. Chocolate: by itself swiss and imported, or in baked into my cookies
28. Season: brotha lynch's season of sickness
29. Holiday: the gift getting ones, like labor day
30. Day: friday feels like that relaxed muscle in your constantly tense forearm
31. Month: that one where the earth, sun, and venus make a right triangle
32. CD: see deez! as well as beck's sea change!
33. Singer: chris cornell or that guy from savage garden
34. Band: red hot chili peppers or the rubber bands used to tie green onions together at the store
35. Sport: ping pong is in-fucking-tense
36. Male Athlete: prefontaine just looked cool because he was played by jared leto in the movie, but with winmill and a.a. riding his balls he's lost any ounce of possible credibility
37. the other one LOL Athlete: who wrote this boater shit?
38. TV Show: conan o'brien is a harvard genius, but i'm sure you know that already
39. Channel: the staticky one with all of the bodies clish-clashing together in the background
40. Music: anything with soul that talks about life, love, and the pursuit of platinum chains

*Friends*

41. Name your friends: wolverine, harry potter, and various samurais too many to name
42. Who is your best friend: solitude.
43. Which is the dizziest: if you're hot and we hook up i could alter your dizzy status (i've got handfuls of these terrible pick-up quips just waiting to be unleashed on the female population! handfuls!)
44. Most Talented: dr. muckerheide
45. Most dorky: "dorky" isn't my vocabulary. most "porky," however, would go to my main man mustafa because he's muslim. that fucking jew.
46. Funniest: dr. muckerheide
47. Smartest: dr. paul muckerheide
48. Coolest: dr. paul muckerheide
49. Shyest: dr. muckerheide
50. Friendliest: dr. muckerheide
51. Most likely to succeed: dr. muckerheide
52. To get into Harvard: dr. muckerheide
53. To be a bum: dr. muckerheide
54. Loudest: dr. muckerheide
55. Funnest to be with: dr. paul muckerheide
56. Laughs the most: dr. muckerheide
57. Always in a good mood: dr. muckerheide
58. Who is most Boy Crazy: dr. muckerheide
59. Chocoholic: dr. muckerheide
60. Who always gets into trouble: dr. muckerheide

*This or That*

61. Hot Chocolate/Coffee: that
62. Eminem/Jay Z: ooooh, a toughie!
63. Math/English: that
64. Cat/Dog: that
65. Candy/Chocolate: that
66. Britney/Christina: this
67. Day/Night: this and that
68. Dark/Light Chocolate: that
69. Top/Bottom: wtf
70. Dumper/Dumpee: that, most likely
71. Internet/Phone: that, $up4 h4x0r
72. AOL/MSN: this
73. Email/Snail mail: nope
74. Smarties/Sweettarts: nope
75. Summer/Winter: yep
76. Cold/Hot: cold hearted, white-hot gaze
77. Give/Get: sometimes
78. Football/Baseball: shut the fuck up

*For Girls Only*

79. Do you have a b/f:
80. How long have yall been together:
81. Do yall love each other:
82. Do you have a crush:
83. How long have you liked him:
84. Have you ever talked to him:
85. What color hair do you like on guys:
86. Color eyes:
87. Would you want him to be tall or short:
88. What do you look for in a guy:
89. Do you want to have kids:
90. How many:
91: Boys' names:
92: Girls' Names:

*For Guys Only*

93. Do you have a g/f: haha
94. How long have yall been together: fuck this is painful
95. Do yall love each other: wait, nevermind
96. Do you have a crush: not right now
97. How long have you liked her: yeah
98. Have you ever talked to her: sure
99. What color hair do you like on girls: i don't really know
100. Long or short hair: this and that
101. What color eyes: what eyes? (psyche) eyes that speak to me are good enough
102. Tall or short: as long as she's cool with me being 5'6''
103. What do you look for in a girl: fun
104. Long term or short term relationship: haha
105. Do you want to have kids: someday
106. How many: a substancial amount
107. Boys' names: of course
108. Girls' names: of course

*Have You Ever*

109. Asked somebody to dance: probably
110. Went skydiving: not yet
111. Smoked: who's reading this?
112. Drank: who's reading this?
113. Been drunk: heh.
114. Done drugs: brb.
115. Been high: okay i'm back.
116. Been high at school/work: heh.
117. Got kicked out of Wal*Mart: is that even a statistic?
118. Been in a fist fight: if you want to call it that
119. Been to Disney World: disneyland
120. Visited Chile: not yet
121. Kissed a guy: my dad, on the cheek, everyday before he goes to work.
122. Kissed a gurl: probably
123. Had sex: what do you think?
124. Been in love: teehee
125. Got a tattoo: temporary

*Finally*

126. Did you like this survey: i haven't done one of these in a while, so i didn't really care, though the friends part was really gay.
127. Were you ever bored: nah, don't be too hard on yourself, you tried your best, and that's all that matters. just practice this survey-making thing, and i'm sure someday you'll be dishing them out like a pro!
128. Could you be doing something better: always
129. Did I do a good job: i lied, you have no survey-making potential. as they say in canada, mucho sucko!