"life is too short to do things you don't like to do" - michael stipe

i'm finally done with fall quarter.

but winter quarter is going to be laaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaame unless i change it.

discombobulated

my sleep is all fucked up and so is my hair! i wish my parents didn't comb my hair to the side when i was a young gun, cuz now it grows in at least two separate directions in the back. check it out next time you see me, it's disgusting (but i'm still sexy!)

yeah, i'm very sexy, despite the thousands of tendrils coming out of my pores. why don't you eat that shit like spaghetti!

okay sleep.

i been nineteen for a week now

alice cooper - i'm eighteen
outkast - git up, git out

i keep thinking about the life aquatic, which i saw last week (for free!). i guess i was one of those people who came into it expecting so much, and i guess i was one of those people who left the theatre pleased. fuck!!! it was great.

i saw flirting and harold & maude this week in honor of bud cort and noah taylor (thanks to rj for pointing them out). and oh my god, seu jorge, the vengeful boxer from city of god was one of my favorite parts of the life aquatic, with his portuguese-sung/spanish-guitar-strummed david bowie covers.

i'm not one of those film snobs who grew up going to revival houses, nor have i seen all (or any) of godard and fellini's filmography (i've only seen the first 45 minutes of 8 1/2!). in fact, i highly dislike those type of people who seem to know everything about films, especially for their elitism. i don't claim to know more about that kind of shit than some yuppie knows about the ghetto, but i know when a movie makes me feel envious of the director's ability and craft.

sometimes i really think about what i'm doing at the uw. i think i've lost a lot of the pretentiousness i had in high school, and i don't know if that's necessarily a good thing. now that i'm technically an adult in college, i don't feel like i'm doing the right thing. is it because i don't have the opportunity to do anything else? am i stuck here at this godforsaken university, doomed to focusing on chemistry instead of philosophy? am i realizing that i really want to be the artfag more than anything else, or am i having the other realization that that same artfag is just a facet of who i am, and that it'll surface later in my life if it's really there? or is it surfacing now, or at least pulling on my sleeve, telling me to rethink where my life is going, telling me that i already know that any choice i make besides that which resides in my belly and heart is destined to be something forlorned?

i was never the teenage prodigy i wanted to be, and goddamn, if anything i'm a largely disappointing version of what i thought i'd be at this age. i've never strayed further from going through the motions, and right now i feel lost more than i ever.

i never know what to write about anymore. blogging sucks.

p.p.s. i'm hungry! and i lack passion. ttyl.